Thursday, January 28, 2010

Put Down the Banana

I'm serious. You think I'm kidding. I try 2 homemade beauty tips a week and this week I tried out a conditioning banana hair mask while I took a bath.
The mask was simple enough, mix one ripe banana with a few drops of almond oil.
I had fun squishing the banana in my hands and mixing it up with the oil and smearing it on my hair.
I enjoyed my bath (another beauty tip: add 1 cup dry milk powder and 3 drops of almond oil to your bath water) I rinsed my hair and got out of the bath.
Then the world began to die a little.
First, I had to sit by my bathtub's side and gently nurse the water down the drain (yes, I suppose this wouldn't be a problem if I had one of those nifty hair-catcher thingys for my drain, but I DON'T, ok?)
Banana + drain = a sad drain. (plus it looks like someone got sick in the tub which I think is disguting.)
Please note: once all the water has gone out and you've collected all the remaining banana pieces- a couple flushings of HOT HOT water should help it unclog, if that doesn't work don't reach for a toxic drain cleaner, a simple solution of baking soda and vinegar left to sit for a while should unclog your drain very nicely.
Anyway, a clogged drain isn't such a horrid thing, I can deal with that.
The banana, however, continued its rein of terror. It left little particles in my hair.
And my hair NOT feel softer. It felt gummy. And I didn't want to have to take a shower because I'd just taken a bath. I like to preserve water (save the whales) and I already feel bad enough when I take the time to spoil myself by taking a bath instead of a shower. But a bath is usually relaxing and loverly so I indulge.
I knew I HAD to take a shower though because, as I wrote in my journal "I have banana shit in my hair. Damn it. It's gross and I feel DIRTY. YECH. (undelined 3 times)
The little recipe should have come with some kind of warning: Banana hair mask should not be done if you're on your way out the door.
At least then you'd know to budget yourself some time before discovering that you now have to wait for the hot water to come back on while in the meantime you look like you've got awful dandruff. As I wrote in my journal, "It's drying and leaving shit balls of banana everywhere- I am NOT happy. I am SO UNCOMFORTABLE."
I took a shower, shampooed and conditioned my hair (which felt entirely redundant) and when I got out, I STILL had banana dandruff.
I combed most of it out and picked the banana shit balls off the floor and decided that if anyone was still bound and determined to use banana on their hair there are certain rules they should follow:
They should use it only in the shower
They should have one of those hair-catching thingys
They should have blonde hair because the dandruff look is just too apparent in darker hair
And they should be COMPLETELY INSANE. kidding. but, not.

BTW: If the conditioning banana hair mask did in fact condition my hair (which, let's give it the benefit of the doubt and say that it DID) it was a heck of a lot of hassle and not enough payback.

Armed with what I now know would I do it again? Nooooo.
Would I change my approach? YESSSSS. Hair-catchy drain thingy, and use only in the shower.
My rating: 0/5

I don't discount the wonders of using banana in homemade beauty products but I think they should only be used on the face or maybe whipped in the blender before application.